The Answer to My Credit Problem

The Fed has inspired me for an answer to my credit problems. I just have to think outside the box. So I called up my past due credit cards and told them I had a plan. I am going to buy all of my debt at 10 cents on the dollar. Now this seemed like a good idea to them since they were thinking they weren't getting anything! But then I told them that I need them to give me another credit card at a much lower interest rate to buy the old debt with. And then in six months or so I was going to need another one to buy that one with. Well, after much explaining how it would work I still didn't have them convinced. Their books would look better and so would my credit report. It's a win win situation, I said! In the long run everybody would be happy! They agreed that it might look better but they didn't have the authority or something like that. Maybe I'm just not talking to the right person.....

I am going to start writing again!

OK! Maybe I haven't seen anything funny about the markets in the last three years! Maybe it's because I'm not that busy with work but I am going to start writing again.

I just want to say this. I believe in the strength and resilience of the American people and also I believe in the efficiency of a free market. I do not want to spread negativity around the internet and that was why I wasn't writing.

Enough said!

A letter to Mr. Bernanke; sub-prime debacle

Dear Mr. Bernanke,

I have come up with a simple plan to solve the current sub-prime mortgage lender fiasco. I noticed that you pumped 76 billion into the short term market last week and I think I have a solution. Instead of pumping all that money into a market that doesn't really know what to do with it all why don't you just give it to the people who need it. Here's a plan that won't get you into trouble.

According to recent numbers there are 2.1 million people that are at least one month behind on their mortgage payments. These are the people that need the money. Why don't you create a sweepstakes company that sends checks out to the people that need the money. The company name can be a bit surreptitious so as not to reveal the source of the cash. How about Bernanke's Billions, or FedCash Cow, something like that.

Okay, you're going to need to send them a check for approximately six months mortgage payments in order to turn this thing around. Let's say the average mortgage payment is about $1300 a month. That would cover mine at least. That means you will need to make out a lot of checks for $7800. I did the math and this amounts to a mere 2 billion 730 million dollars. Now you and I know that everyone is not going to plunk all this money down on their mortgage so this will amount to an instant shot in the arm for the economy. Necessary items like beer, used cars, WalMart, etc. will experience an immediate boost. Wall street pundits will breathe a sigh of relief and business will go on as usual. Don't worry about the stock market. We are the work dogs that power the national economy and the stock market.

Oh yeah, you're going to have to get started on this right away! I have another mortgage payment due this week.